A Lesson for Those Who Are Often Told to “Take Up Less Space” (and Those Who Tell Them To Do So)

I dedicate this to all the people who have “big personalities” — who wear their emotions on their sleeves, who choose to speak up rather than stand down, and who often get told they should “tone it down,” because even though they have learned how to be polite and let others have a turn, they still shine too brightly and make other people uncomfortable. Here’s the truth: it’s not you, it’s them.

And if you are one of those people who thinks that other people are standing in the place you think you should have, or getting the attention you wish you could command, this is for you too.

Listen and understand:

No one is standing in your spot.
No one CAN stand in your spot.

The Universe in its infinite wisdom created you, and your place in it is as big as you dare for it to be. No one has to “make room” for you, or step aside from themselves in order for you to have your space. It is already there and it is yours by holy right.

You can be imitated, but you cannot be replaced. You can be intimidated into shrinking yourself, but that’s only if you agree to it. If you are not occupying all the space you need in the Universe, if your personal expression of yourself is in any way cramped, it is not because space has been stolen from you, or does not exist. That is an illusion, a delusion that you are buying into.

No one is standing in your spot.
No one CAN stand in your spot.
Take all the space you need to express your full self, and don’t apologize for it.

You are not too big for an infinite Universe, and you are not under an obligation to pretend you are small so that someone else feels better next to you. You are not standing in their spot either.

The Universe is infinite and always expanding. Not only is there enough room for you as you are now, there is always plenty of room for you to grow.

Here endeth the lesson.

A believer in magic and justice and the right to be exactly as you are. Anything passing for wisdom here is likely the product of surviving my own stupidity.

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